So of course my friend Ted and I had to comment more creatively. (To be fair, starting it was his idea. I just came up with some of the wording. :))
With apologies to Emma:
Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to shop cheap,
The violent refuse queued outside the store.
Tell these, the chairless, tempest-tossed, to flee:
For low-cost lamps they'll beat you at the door!